In the world of food porn, every once in awhile, you run into a burger that’s truly centerfold-worthy.
And you guys…
You guys.
I came face-to-face with one last night — Day 3 of my Search for the Holy Grail of ‘Noke Hamburgers — and frankly, I’m still kinda reeling.
Don’t believe me? Here’s the Money Shot:
Bam. One look and you know you what you want.
Now before you judge me, I have to say, honestly, that it’s really, really hard to talk about this burger in a way that doesn’t sound almost laughably scandalous. This thing just provokes that kind of reaction.
To prove my point — I texted the picture above one of my food-loving girlfriends, and her immediate response was:
See what I mean? Sounds terrible even when it isn’t.
But let’s get down to brass tacks here.
I don’t really know how I’ve missed out on the R&R burger for so long, but somehow I did. I didn’t even know it *existed* until I started talking to folks about my 14-day ‘Noke Burger Challenge, and the reactions were positively zealous: “You *are* going to try the River & Rail burger, right? What? You haven’t tried it? You have to. You have to. You have to.”
I think I missed it in the same way people miss my favorite burger at Local Roots — if you’re the sort of person who goes to nice restaurants for dinner more often than lunch, and who sits down at a table looking forward to a multi-course meal, then the burger simply isn’t on the menu.
In fact, when I sat down at the bar last night with my sweet girl Hayley, the burger wasn’t even on the bar menu. I had to ask for it specifically.
And people, trust me: Ask and ye shall receive. π
But let’s back up a few steps.
This burger fits beautifully into the overall ethos of River & Rail – a small, Southern, locally-focused restaurant in South Roanoke that’s presided over by executive chef Aaron Deal, a James Beard Rising Star semifinalist. Everything about this place, from the decor to the food, is stylish without being stuffy — like a high-class dame dressed down in {expensive} flats and a straw fedora.
It’s *exactly* the kind of place I think of when I hear the term “casual-chic.”
Like most everything else on the menu, the burger ($12 at lunch) is clearly built by hand using high-quality ingredients. Cut it in half, and you can see just from the grind alone that this is *not* your average pre-ground chuck…
This is the good stuff:
And it’s at this point that I want to make something absolutely clear: this burger is really, really, euphorically good — but that isn’t just because it’s so big. The whole experience of it is layered with a tremendous sense of intentionality, both in terms of taste and texture. The “burger sauce” — smoky-sweet and sopping beautifully into the bun — is balanced perfectly by the spicy, crunchy bite of the house-made pickles.
But notice: those pickles are on the bottom of the sandwich — not the usual top — so that they bookend the crispy-fried onion straws. Why am I going on about this? Because. The construction of this sandwich means that you get a serious top-and-bottom-tooth crunch when you take a bite, followed by the soft, hot patty in the center.
It’s like textural surround-sound for your mouth.
Hayley and I made quite the picture while we chowed down: a pair of hundred-pound, sweet-faced ladies pounding back some of the biggest burgers in the ‘Noke, with sauce all over our faces and fingers, totally oblivious to all standards of ladylike decency:
So now it’s happened. I’ve finally found a burger that rivals my favorite.
Is it the Holy Grail of ‘Noke Hamburgers? … Only time will tell.
Until tomorrow, friends!
–Ashley β€